Well, we said SEE YA LATER to Aunt Marge today with a lot of family in attendance.

It's of course, bittersweet. We saluted her long happy life and all of the generosity, mirth, love, and tenderness as well as shared some funny stories. A sendoff that I'm sure she was touched by looking down on us.

Those of you who know me know that I'm not the textbook definition of a religious person. I have to say the events of the past few years have certainly altered, if not changed that.

Today I'm struck by how a day that started off wet and rainy, managed to hold up for the majority of the service with just a minor drizzle to not really even inconvenience us. There were many rainbows on the way up to Marge's new home on earth.

I have to say THANKS for keeping the rains at bay for your family.

Tonight it's absolutely been DUMPING, as if the sky opened up and let go of all of our pent up tears.

 

Wow is all I can say, and I'm not exactly known for brevity. Some would simply say Shut Up!           


Actually many have, on occasion. Whatevs!   

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

But I digress. The memorial was attended by many many family members from all sides of our close and special family. The few who couldn't make it had health reasons, passed their cares on to all of us and most will be back there in July to re-celebrate and see if they're keeping the lawn nice and tidy.

It, other than the occasion, was a very nice family get together. We had family from Milpitas, Hanford, Chico, Sonoma, Berkekey, SF, and more. Aunt's, uncles, cousins, nephews, nieces, fom 9 to 94!

Kirk, our resident pastor, and cousin gave a truly heartfelt sermon/eulogy/discourse and reminded us that this was not goodbye, simply See Ya Later, and read from Thessalonians.

Family members shared stories and fond memories of the EEPIE CHOOIE KID.

What a treasure! We were all so lucky to have her in our lives for so long. Big thanks for hanging around Aunt Marge.

BTW there is a GREAT obit in the Chronicle today, you can view it online here;

http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/sfgate/obituary.aspx?n=marjorie-belben&pid=184341198

Seeing all of my extended family today was exceptional. Let's stay better in touch, get together more often, say prayers for those who are struggling with ...whatever.

We are absolutely blessed to have the family we do.

What a difference a week makes.

We lost Aunt Marge last week. She had fallen and hit her head, causing a subdural hemotoma. Initially she showed progress but then had to have surgery. I'm sorry to say that despite all best efforts and family by her side, she simply never woke up after surgery. She passed without pain just napping away. A very peaceful passing. Rest in Peace Aunt Marge, we all miss you but are pretty sure that they just needed a warmhearted teaching nurse with a side order of silliness up there.
*******************************************************************************
Aunt Marge and the long wonderful life of the Eepie Chooie Oowie Wow Kid

I've been looking through pictures from family gatherings and looking for pics of Aunt Marge, and the one thing that keeps striking me is how many of the pics are not of her smiling as much as of her "questioning" with a curious, puzzled look on her face.  There are pics of her smiling, don't get me wrong, but our family is a bunch of tough nuts to crack when it's photo time. 

For a person with so much inquisitiveness, the fact that she remained so gentle is amazing. Many, maybe most people who question much of the world turn out to be not only skeptical, but cynical.  Her questioning was always just a desire to understand more, with no strings attached. The cynicism never happened with Marge. I can't remember her ever having a cross word for anyone, whether they deserved it or not. 

We would talk about our shared frustration with the care of mom, and while being on the same page with me in so many areas, she always came back to what can we do to positively move the situation forward.

My ability to remain sane in the face of continued adversity was helped over and over by our talks in person and on the phone. Her insights will be sorely missed. Her warmth is irreplaceable.

Speaking with her littlest brother the other night he wondered if her mom would be waiting for her up there. I say no doubt. Marge will have a first class ticket straight up simply based on her kind soul. We all have experienced the incredible kindness of the nurses, doctors, staff at care centers, from hospitals, SNF's, and nursing homes. They already have their reservations and first class tickets, and apparently they needed a nice teaching nurse named Marjorie Ruth up there as well.  God Speed Marge B, God Speed.

Went over to see mom today and I spoke to the Speech Therapist Lydia. Nice girl and very caring. She is in the process of moving mom through the "mechanical soft" aspect of her diet and into the "real food" area. She has to do a couple more evaluations and then she can sign off.
Mom has not been too impressed with the menu but truthfully she never is. Not at the Towers, Not at the Coventry, not here. Unless she's going out to eat at the Olive Garden or Osteria or House of Prime Rib, she's not going to like the food. The chopped texture of her medically required diet is not very appealing. Once we get the okay for regular food, we can bring her "outside" food. KFC chicken is top of the list, a burger from Cable Car Diner, a turkey sandwich from Arguello Supermarket.

Today she had a visit from the Lupine Gang. Victor, Jan, and Douwa! Jan brought her a nice rose for Valentines Day and the Gazette to read.

Biggest complaint (among many) is that she's lonely there. So any visits from loyal readers are MUCH appreciated. 2707 Pine 502B


That's all for now.

Quick Sunday Morning MomMarMupdate.

Mom is status steady. Barbies went on a road trip.


More later as more info is available.

MUPDATE! 

That's a Mom update.  So I visited yesterday and met Quinn also coming for  visit. Mom was with the Occupational therapist and they were practicing walking with the walker.

This is good. Mom's ribs (from all appearances) are healing. She has lost some weight since arriving, doesn't like the food. DUH!

However she has progressed from primarily pureed food to the next step which is called "mechanical soft" Basically chopped rather than pureed. Heading in the right direction. Last nights dinner was a Hamburger and Tater tots. The hamburger itself was chopped and was less than ideally appetizing though the tater tots were fine. I convinced her to eat about half of the burger and all of the tater tots.

I took that occasion to track down the speech therapist and had a long talk with her. She is the person that gives the okay to move from pureed to mechanical soft to steak and eggs. She agreed that she will work with the insurance/medicare to reinstate the third discipline so that she can work with mom again and get her heading towards solid foods. At that point we could actually bring her a real burger, or some of the Colonels best chicken. YAY!   

BTW the perverse health care system medicare decided that once mom had "plateaued" they would reduce therapy to only two disciplines of the three (PT, OT, ST) so they abruptly cancelled speech therapy. The mental mediocracy of the insurance providers rears it's ugly head again. So the Speech therapist and I discussed having OT pull back (since they overlap with PT) to allow ST to get back in the game. The people who make these decisions at Hill/medicare/HealthNet are condemned to a lifetime in the ninth circle of Hell!

 

That's my two cents.And I have A LOT of experience with this.

On a Second Front.....     Aunt Marge had a fall the other night and hit her head.  She is staying at Che St. Francis for a little more observation, she's a bit weak so they may send her to a SNF for a little rehab before letting her go back home on her own.

I saw her today and she was much better and in pretty darn good spirits. Strong chance for a full recovery!!  YAY


All for now, more later as news happens.

Just posted a couple drafts that had been languishing in the "draft" stage. Belatedly

A quick one after watching a rerun of Code Black titled Unfinished Business (aired 1/11/17)

In addition to being a great show, with a great cast, this episode was amazing on many deep levels and only becomes clear (as well as life affirming) at the end.

An incredible rendition of Coldplays hit Fix You with accompaniment by a choir
 Best episode all season, maybe best in both seasons.

https://www.tvfanatic.com/shows/code-black/full-episodes/

Merry Upcoming Christmas to All, Happy Holidays as well!

Going to try to be a more persistent/consistent blogger this next year.

Looking forward to Christmas in Tiburon tomorrow. Sadly, mom can't join us as she is not a good candidate for travel right now due to the broken ribs. We'll miss her and toast her!

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Want to share some new music, some great, some odd, some eclectic, some stunning. You check em out and decide for yourselves.

The order might just be the most recently discovered.

Love is All by The Tallest Man On Earth 
I recently caught this at the end of a tv show when I remember which one I'll tell ya. File under Eclectic, reminiscent of early Dylan.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BsZt_3MifU


O Superman by Laurie Anderson
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vkfpi2H8tOE
File under Eclectic, VERY Eclectic!  Haunting!

Nasty Letter by Otis Taylor
From the Shooter soundtrack
Great movie, better song
File under DAMNNNNN that guy can play!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ng-1QJZxiBY

Christmas Won't be the Same Without You by the Same White T's
I like the harmonies a bunch. We need a nice Christmas Song.....Right??
 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gatdvr_uyWs&list=RDgatdvr_uyWs#t=5

 Say Goodbye by Beck
Interesting song, can't remember where I heard it. But hey, Beck is ...BECK!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7cjpmMWEKqs

Voodoo in My Blood by Massive Attack, Young Fathers
NOT for the faint of heart, but nice little wacko mini movie. Loved the sound.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ElvLZMsYXlo

All for now more later, books to come as well as shows I doubt you watch, (but you SHOULD)

I visited Mom today at Golden Gate Rehab, she was in relatively good spirits, she's still a bit confused about a couple of things, I suspect defense mechanisms to be a cause of this.

I brought some family photos which she liked a lot.

Her hair was nicely brushed

So she's not thrilled with the changes but I think she understands that it needed to happen.

Meanwhile the family is kicking butt cleaning, moving, re purposing everything from furniture to photos. The wonder twins Scott and Quinn are doing miracle work at the apartment on their days *off*

So we're all working on packing and distributing moms stuff to family and the cancer society. She just has too much stuff. She's at the Golden Gate rehabilitation center and healing, slowly but surely. But she will need 24 hour care going forward. While she's likely spunky enough to go home at some point, she just can't be left alone for long periods due to her propensity to fall and the potential to hurt herself even worse.

She's probably somewhat bionic, however not infallible.

What we're discovering, aside from her being just shy of a well organized hoarder, is the amazing collection of things to make things, fix things, create things. I always new that she was creative, growing up with things she had made, from tin can trees, to easter egg trees, to paintings, to all of the holiday decorations, to the collections of rebuilt Barbie's. 

What I noticed when packing up her tools is how many tools she has that I sell on a daily basis to hundreds of San Franciscans at my job. The only thing she was missing is a workbench in a little shop.

Pretty sure where I got my proclivity to take apart and repair things that has been one of my

raison d'être most of my life. Both my folks were somewhat handy but mom really takes the cake.

 

 

So Mom had a birthday last Sunday!  Yep, 92 years young.

Satisfied with her lung power despite 8 broken ribs, mom smiles at the job well done.

We celebrated at the nursing home/rehabilitation center where she is recovering from her big fall.

Good celebration which everyone enjoyed. Great company, Marge, Herb, Scott, Quinn, and well wishes from relatives all around. Paul called but we couldn't connect, but we sent pics to him and he returned best wishes.

Caught a couple of pics of the nonagenarians enjoying the cheesecake/birthday cake.

 A good time was had by all.